ESA and the lunch connundrum

Today, in the rush to leave home and get to the office at a decent (although entirely all-too-early) hour, I forgot to grab something to take for lunch. Pay attention to this fact, as it sets the stage for the early afternoon drama that I found myself in the middle of.

I genuinely like my job. I work for Executive Scheduling Associates where I basically am a scheduling associate for executives...hence the name! Part of my job is calling all over the United States, including the east coast...hence the leaving the house at all-too-early hours of the morning. My days usually start at 7 (or if i am being really on top of my game 6am), so right around 10 or 11am I usually start to get so hungry that a mid-morning snack/full-blown frozen TV dinner (of the SmartOnes variety) is necessary. I have been known to stick lasagna in the microwave at 930am. I know...freaky. I run the risk of people looking at me like I am a nerd, but the alternative (being a starving lunatic) is a lot less worse.


Today, as I am at the office, painfully aware that I forgot my lunch, and equally aware that I still have three hours of calling left to do for one client, I go to the mini-fridge and survey its contents (none of which I brought in, so why I am surveying them, heaven only knows). I settle on opening the freezer door, and see this marvelous SmartOnes (one of the best frozen dinners a single girl could ask for). Turkey, gravy, stuffing and mixed veggies. Not necessarily what I would've chosen when I was at the store and putting things in my cart, but hey, convenience breeds necessity. And, at this time, I was ready to gnaw off my left foot and chew on that.


So, I need to give you a little background on this particular dinner that was located in our staff fridge. Its been in there so long, that it should've had its own phone extension and benefits package by now. I can't remember a day when it was not in there. At least a good three weeks this dinner has stared me in the face every time I open the freezer door. Most times, I stare right past it, eyes locked on my own dinner, pull that one out and expertly cook it for 4 1/2 minutes on high, turn 1/4 turn, then another 4 minutes on high, let sit for 1-2 minutes. (Its almost as difficult as duck confit, except duck confit only requires an extra 3 minutes on half heat.) This time, however, when faced with this forgotten, left-behind delicious turkey dish, I had pity on it. I debated for about 2 minutes, talked it over with another co-worker and finally decided that if someone had not eaten it by now, it wasn't going to happen.


4 minutes on high, 1/4 turn and 1 minute later, I was enjoying a feast. In fact, it was so good that I reconsidered my prior opinion about choosing it the next time I visit my local FoodMaxx.

So, my stomach is happy, my clients are happy (because I am no longer a raving lunatic waiting to bite their heads off because they are being retarded)...the world is good.

Until, I hear, off in the distance, "Mom...? Someone ate my dinner." It registers in my brain that the dinner that my boss' daughter is referring to was none other than the SmartOnes Turkey Buffet that i just practically inhaled not even 20 minutes ago. Mortification set in and I hid in my office for a gut-wrenching 20 seconds until I could no longer stand it.

Confession time. I told poor Alyssa that I ate her dinner, and that it was truly delicious, and that next time, if she wanted her dinner to be there, to not leave it in there for days and days and days.

Just kidding...actually, I apologized and told her I will replace it. But, part of me maintains that there has to be some sort of free-for-all limit on frozen dinners.

I'm going to work on writing it into the ESA Employee Handbook.

because its always good to examine one's life...

i figure with someone who has professed a love of blogging, i better pick up the pace. Two blogs in 2 weeks? COME ON! (picture Gob Bluth yelling here.) Here are my top ten summer moments, thus far.

1. Mel's birthday party at Logan's: sitting outside on the patio, myself and some friends were having fun laughing at me acting like a cat who'd just gotten declawed (picture those high quality cloth napkins that Logan's has, wrapped around my fists and my white nubs "walking" across the table to the delight of onlookers.
   


2. First round of packing the Fleck's picture frames. I suck at packing. Enough said.
   


3. Art Hop! Words cannot express how alive it made my heart feel to walk around downtown with art happening all around me. Not to mention the beautiful boutiques with the amazing merch that i will be able to purchase if and when I become either a) a trophy wife or b) an independently wealthy career woman.
   


4. New cell phone! Thanks Verizon for the hook up. I love the Voyager! (not Star Trek Voyager, which actually, I did used to like, but the LG Voyager). Touch screen, mobile tv...so many more accoutrements than I'm used to my own puppy-gnawed motorola Q. In fact, i was so jubilant that i threw away my old phone in the trash!
   


5. Growing out my toes for manicure purposes! I know this sounds gross, but one of my favorite parts of summer is having cute colors on my toes. Although, those who know me best know that I fail to have color on my toes all the time, but when i do, its a great joy to look down and see cute little nails. So...long story short, please don't think that i am unhygenic.
   


6. Jake's bbq: i like it when old friends come back and give us a very good reason to throw a rip-roaring party, complete with much too much laughing and all those big balls on Wipeout. Its always good to let the hair down a little to celebrate people's presence in our lives.
   


7. Small group: ladies, ladies, ladies: fun times! If only Big Brother, Wipeout, Survivor, ANTM, Top Chef, the Office, 30 Rock and all those other shows were on each week. Oh wait, they are. Thus, never a reason to stop meeting, eating popcorn and raisenettes, guzzling diet soda, and taking breaks to discuss how we are doing, and what we are stuggling with. If only I can win the BB pot! COME ON DAN!!!
   


8. NEW ROOMMATE! Welcome Rebekah Grace David! Anyone need a hairstylist? Call my roommate, she's the bomb!
   


9. Charter... and the reason why I can blog in the first place. The guy who installed it was so nice, although when my MOXI box (Tivo's ugly step-child) started foaming a pancake-like substance out of the bottom of mybox, that was a little disconcerting. Ah well, we are trying again and will get it right!
   


10. The day the fires began. Oddly enough, I know this may sound really insensitive, and believe me when i say that I am not thankful for the fires. But the weather that day...AMAZING. I am a bona fide fan of lightning...just not when it strikes forests and burns down California. Boo on that.
    

And, due to my Gob reference, I am in the process of writing top 10 Arrested Development phrases that must make it into my Fall, 2008 phraseology. Nothing can be better than adopting some of the best dialogue ever written.

tivo and how its ruining my life

I have this crush...a MAN crush. I recognize that being male is implied in my use of the word "crush", but this guy is a MAN, all dignified, in-charge. dare-I-say "older". He just has this aura of awe around him. The kind of beauty that makes you stutter when face-to-face and in conversation with him. He's a total crush-worthy specimen, and every day that I see him, I always think "dang it! why did I have to wear this to work today?!?!"
This morning, I woke up with that special feeling. I knew this would the one of those crush-days. He comes into my office to visit someone in the building, and inexplicably, I always know when the crush-day is a-coming. Its like i can feel his aura around me, ready to make an appearance.
So, this morning, when i got ready for work, I did it with extra care, being super precise. Just the right amount of eye shadow (too little: school marm, too much:trampy). Did my hair cute (or so said my roommate, the soon-to-be-licensed hairstylist and guru for all things chic in hair up-and-coming. I even made sure my toes were properly manicured (actually, this last one was him fortuitously catching me on the right day...i hadn't made it around to anxiously picking off my nail polish yet).
Throughout that entire morning, i kept waiting for him to arrive. (tivo reference: if this were on TV, i would've tivo'ed the whole interaction and I'd be watching it tomorrow, fast forwarding through the crazy boring parts of the anticipation).
Finally, around 1pm, he came. Dressed-down enough that its apparent he really knows how to dress 5up. Friendly laugh as he enters the building. Be still my beating heart! I guess he was in the office to visit someone and go out to lunch because minutes later, i see them leaving and the pass by my window for a small second of time.
Now, here's where i wish Tivo was something more than just for TV. As he walked past, i searched that left hand for something shinny or matted, anything that would signify a life-long vow to another lucky woman. But, what should happen? Did i see anything? No...i didn't. And, not for lack of trying. He apparently is also a gold-medal winner in the speed walking Olympics. He was in my line of sight for a total of 2 seconds, not nearly long enough to try to ascertain if he is a part of a pair.
Here's the kicker...I actually reached for a remote to press the skip back button, so that I could skip and pause. But, astonishingly enough, no button really does exist! Horror!
So, pretty much, I'm annoyed that Tivo can't diversify its market to human brains.

And, also, I found out toward the end of the day that he has a girlfriend. Damn.

Inaugural Blog: an Ode to Blogging

Well, e-world, I've finally done it. Become a producing member of the blogging sphere. I have to tell you, I love blogging. Some people have described blogging as logorrhea (def: verbal diarrhea), done by those who have a specific need for those around them or those never met to know what they are thinking. For passive-aggressive people out there, blogging can be a way for those of us to get our irks out in a non-threatening way. (When i need to vent a little passive-aggression, i simply go online to craigslist missed connections and let it fly.)

However, for me, I love blogging, yes I do, because it helps me to reflect on my life in a way that reminds me that:

1. i have way too much fun than is necessary. (side-discussion: can one truly have too much fun? i don't think so, but I'll leave it up to you to decide.)


2. i love sharing my quirky times with those around me so that you can laugh too. (side-discussion: bringing over my blogs from myspace to blogger. worth the time? those were some dang good blogs, if i don't say so myself.)

For a long time, I had resisted going over to blogger from myspace. While myspace is so comprehensive in attempting to get at a person's personality (side-discussion: myspace pages really are how you want to be perceived), my blogs on myspace are complimentary to the rest of my profile. Kinda like "hey, these are my pictures! Hey, oh, there are my friends! And, there, for your viewing pleasure, is my blog, all my random moments and thoughts on the things I encounter on a daily basis. Moving over to blogger, however, now is only about what i write. Am i defined by what i blog about, how often i blog or how good I am at blogging? No...not really. But i still can't get over the fact that it is a little intimidating. When I start something, i want to be the best. So, the perfectionist in me screams: "you will never be one of the favorite blogs on blogger's main page! so why even try?" Well, I try because often, the joy is in the process of trying and failing, or, what's better, trying and succeeding. So, perfectionistic tendancies be damned. I am going to write in spite of them.

And, to answer my previous question, i think i will bring over my blogs from myspace. Or attempt to, at least. To give you, my viewing public (which in reality is probably only one or two of my friends) a background on my life. And, selfishly, so i can read all those old blogs and laugh again (and again).

In unrelated news: when I was blogging today, underneath my text box it has a "labels for this post" option and the examples of good labels are "scooters, vacation, fall". Being my first time to blogger, I've never experienced labeling a post, and who knows, its probably always those same three words. However, today it strikes me as funny that two of those, when paired together, have had such an impact on my life, specifically scooters and fall (not as in the season, as in laying it down). Love that scooter. Love the bum knees that i have because of the scooter.